He felt his eyes darken each time his cock reaches his hot core. His knees felt weak, his fingers claw into the wall as the pleasure becomes higher and higher, allowing Xue Yang to take and take, satisfying him and himself, enjoyed being ravished by him. The moment he spilled his seed, he cums and biting his lower lips to hold back his moans, hot seed splattered as his orgasm crash through him.
He takes a few moments to ride out his high as the water washes away over them. He waits a few moments to relax, enjoying the high. He then turns around to wordlessly kisses him softly on the lips in appreciation.
He takes a few breaths to to enjoy that high before Xingchen turns. He looks up at him but before he can speak his lips are captured into a kiss. He closes his eyes as he leans up into the kiss, some of that gremlin energy easing into a softness he isn't used to feeling.
Perhaps some of Xingchen's tenderness is wearing off on him, or maybe he is just tired from the two rounds they have gone through.
Up close, he's gazing into his dark eyes and he can see how handsome he is, but also feolt his darkness and his pain. Its kinda cute that his gremlin energy is being softened by his tenderness, but perhaps his feelings is growing deeper as well? The years they know each other in Yi City, and up until now, he never knew his name, thinking of him as his nameless, mysterious friend and never bother to ask for his name, thinking someday they will part ways and forget each other.
When the kiss broke, he gaze into his eyes, nuzzles lovingly at his nose. Even though he said nothing at all first, in his gaze, he know he belongs to him, his fondness of him grows deeper, and so he wraps his arms around him as the water washes away.
He lets it be know that he's appreciated, "That's a lovely gift, Xue Yang. I think that's what I wanted and I enjoyed that. How about you?"
He wraps his arms around him, still finding being hugged to be unfamiliar and odd territory for him. Any sort of affection is something he saw very little of in his lifetime.
"Of course I enjoyed it, daozhang." He smirks for a moment but then his expression becomes slightly softer. "Happy Birthday."
He holds him in his arms and he felt a connection as their bodies and souls are together as one in the embrace. He smiles gently at him, "You deserve a present too for all of your birthdays."
He smiles again, finding his soft expression very sweet, and cute, very cute. The moment he shows his expression, he knew this is his soulmate, but he wouldn't tell him he discovered this secret, but he will unravel slowly by the day.
"Xue Yang, I promise I won't tell anybody. It will be our secret. That I think you're sweet and very handsome...." His hands travel up his chest and draw a heart on his chest. "I have a present for you, right here. One that will last forever."
He leans forward to whisper in his ear, in a sweet voice, "Wo ai ni, A-Yang."
Those words are very foreign to him and sends a shock right through his body. So much so that he has a hard time even believing them. He tries to ignore it, letting himself believe that Xingchen is just having some residual intoxicated feelings from being intimate moments ago.
So instead he focuses on the other things that the man said, unable to form those words himself. At least not yet. He understands sex and the mindless things that go along with it, but feelings and love are just outside of his grasp.
He clears his throat and shifts back slightly, "Daozhang...you should finish cleaning up."
There is a tightness in his chest and it's hard to pretend to keep his cool with those words echoing in his ear.
He is intoxicated and high on his feelings from being intimate, infatuated and the emotions are real. To him, it's something more than that. His reaction isn't what he quite expected that he felt a little backlash and a sudden crash to reality.
"Oh, I'm..." He thickly swallows, realizing that he gave his heart away so easily. But he...doesn't quite understand what just happened or what he's feeling. "Okay." That's not quite the reaction he's hoping for and he wonders if he did something wrong or is being too expressive or forward.
Feeling a sudden crash, trying to think. "No, I'm going to stay here for a while." The water is hot after all. "The hot water is nice."
Wanting to grasp whatever happiness he has, because today he survived and lived to this year, he still has some gratitude for him. "Um. Thank you. For coming to my birthday. I really mean that." He steps back and looks away.
Good thing water is good for washing away tears when it stings as he rubs his face, trying to wake up from his own stupidity.
Xue Yang isn't one to feel guilty about anything. He never has doubted his choices in life. There were times when he probably should have felt regret but it merely pushed it aside and confused it with another emotion like sadness or anger. So when that ping of guilt strikes him, it makes him feel sick. He knows he can't give Xingchen what he wants to hear. Those words won't come so easily off his tongue when he has never spoken them to anyone before in his life.
There is silence for a moment, Xue Yang still standing in the same spot as if glued there. Awkardly unsure what to do with himself. He needs to get cleaned up as well but he can't quite move ahead yet. "Daozhang...you're the first person to ever say that to me."
He will admit to that at least. But he knows that if they just let this go the air will be thick with awkwardness in their cabin. There isn't really an escape for them considering they sleep in the same place and they will end up there at the end of the day whether they want to or not.
Xue Yang doesn't want to disappoint Xingchen, but he also can't go against his nature and simply saying something so profound so quickly is impossible for him.
He stands under the shower, feeling pitiful, stupid, and sorry for himself, mentally kicking himself for being naive and innocent. He's falling for a man who was a known assassin, stained his hands with the blood of innocents, and did many terrible things and his own emotions is becoming a confusing mess.
Finally, he looks at him and he realized he misunderstood. It's that sad look, that paralyzed feeling emotions that also touches his heart. He listens to his confession, him admitting it, and maybe his intuition that he felt from before isn't wrong and he tries to understand.
"I'm your first? I think...we have plenty of first today." Silence followed and finally when he felt all clean and gathers the mental energy to scrub and felt anew.
No, there's no disappointment. Just a simple concern and care, "C'mon Xue Yang. If you stayed here too long, you'll get all pruney from all the steam."
He hands him a towel, "And let's slow down and take our time. I'm sorry. But what I felt for you, it's been there for a while now."
Xue Yang grew up on the streets not in the comfort of a sect or under the care of a good teacher. He had no one to watch over him or guide his growth. There was no one that even showed him an ounce of interest. He did what he had to to learn and survive and grow. The fact he even lived this long is a miracle and only made so because of his strong will. So of course he never had anyone to tell him that he was loved.
He cares for Xingchen. He knows that much. If it is love, he can't be sure. Not yet anyway. Not until he can sort out what he is feeling and has time to process it. He won't say something that he isn't sure he feels with every fiber of his soul.
"How can it possibly be a long time? You didn't know it was me in Yi City and you haven't been here that long. How can you be sure what you are feeling?"
Perhaps what he really needs is someone to explain what it even is to have those kinds of feelings and how to know when they have formed.
He shook his head. He finds himself unable to move from the spot, just wanting to linger under the shower much longer. Perhaps he's waiting for Xue Yang to move on and leave him there. Part of him is ready to flee and hide, hide back to that memory in Winter Faire where the feeling for him is genuine and well-hidden and kept away from him.
"It's not Yi City. It's much later than that. It's at the Winter Faire. That's when you changed, and I changed, and I can finally see and I'm seeing you, and that's when I wanted to see more of you." He still doesn't understand it himself and the intensity and complexity of his feelings, but he wishes those days never end.
"Like I said if it goes too fast for you, then I'll slow down."
He walks up and gets under the water again, he closes his eyes as he lets it hit his face and pour down over his hair. He contemplates that for a moment. He knows that he has cared for Xingchen since Yi City. Perhaps only becoming aware of it the moment he lost him...but knowing the feelings were lingering there beneath the surface before then.
"I liked daozhang in Yi City." He's not afraid to admit that. Even if he can't quite understand love, he knows that much.
"It's already been a long time for me." He turns his face and opens his eyes to look at him. "Are you going to stop liking me if I can't say those words yet?"
He blinks and maybe he's starting to understand, he nodded. "Since then...? Doesn't feel like long ago when I was blind. I thought you liked me better when I'm like that." He's grateful to his nephew and the doctor of the Wen sect to help restore his sight.
"I don't know yet." It's his honest answer and he doesn't quite understand either. "But we just made love, so I think that's special. That's why I think we may have something and I wanted to tell you how I felt about you since then. If you don't want me to stop, then we'll just keep going and continue what we have. Love is a very good thing and it means we're becoming a light to each other."
"It doesn't matter to me if you can see or not. It's whatever makes you comfortable that counts, daozhang."
He listens to him talk about being a light and wanting to continue. As long as Xue Yangs hesitancy towards the word love isn't enough to scare him off then he is glad to continue walking down this path with Xingchen.
"I'm going to save them and you'll hear them when you least expect them."
He doesn't mind his hesitancy since he's hesitant as well. "I preferred to be able to see, so I could read books and watch movies. Even if they're a little boring, knowledge is important."
He managed a soft laugh and a soft smile. "I'm surprised you like those things, Xue Yang. I wasn't a romantic at all. I'm just a simple daoist priest that doesn't make much money." He's going to shut off the water because he over rinsed and then takes a towel to dry himself and then get dressed in his hoodie and pants.
"I'm going to read a book and then go to sleep." He said, letting him know his evening is free.
He grabs a towel and starts to dry off as well. He pulls on his clothes and tosses the towel into a bin. "Alright Daozhang. I might just head back to the cabin and go to sleep." He has nothing else he desires to do for the day. It's already been exciting enough for him.
"Come back to my cabin and sleep." He's going to lean in and gives him a quick, sweet kiss on his lips before giving the other the space he needs to think about what has transpired.
"I prayed to the train that you come back and when you did, you're in my cabin. I sleep better when you're around."
He leans into that kiss even though it is quick and then takes Xingchen's hand so that he can pull him towards the door.
"We sleep in the same cabin so you must sleep really well every night." He grins as he looks at him. Clearly the train knew what was going to happen before they did.
"Leave it to me if they bother you." Raven is a nice quiet girl and is one of the healers, but Vexen can be a bit eccentric.
The cabin is empty when they arrived. Xingchen searched for his book from his bed. "Would you like me to read to you as you sleep? It's a book of fairy tales."
"Pretty sure that fairy tales would put me to sleep." It's not exactly the kind of story he would actually care about. But since xingchen is telling it he will at least listen to them for awhile. He flops down on his bed, kicking his shoes beneath it.
"Good. I tell you good ones." Once Xue Yang relaxes and becomes comfortable on his bed, he sat on his bed. There isn't much space, but the weight of his body is warm and close as he curls up on the bed trying to sleep.
He reads out small tales from his book until Xue Yang drifts off and once he does, he smooths out his long black hair as he sleeps off before going to sleep himself on his bed opposite of him.
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He takes a few moments to ride out his high as the water washes away over them. He waits a few moments to relax, enjoying the high. He then turns around to wordlessly kisses him softly on the lips in appreciation.
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Perhaps some of Xingchen's tenderness is wearing off on him, or maybe he is just tired from the two rounds they have gone through.
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When the kiss broke, he gaze into his eyes, nuzzles lovingly at his nose. Even though he said nothing at all first, in his gaze, he know he belongs to him, his fondness of him grows deeper, and so he wraps his arms around him as the water washes away.
He lets it be know that he's appreciated, "That's a lovely gift, Xue Yang. I think that's what I wanted and I enjoyed that. How about you?"
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"Of course I enjoyed it, daozhang." He smirks for a moment but then his expression becomes slightly softer. "Happy Birthday."
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He smiles again, finding his soft expression very sweet, and cute, very cute. The moment he shows his expression, he knew this is his soulmate, but he wouldn't tell him he discovered this secret, but he will unravel slowly by the day.
"Xue Yang, I promise I won't tell anybody. It will be our secret. That I think you're sweet and very handsome...." His hands travel up his chest and draw a heart on his chest. "I have a present for you, right here. One that will last forever."
He leans forward to whisper in his ear, in a sweet voice, "Wo ai ni, A-Yang."
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So instead he focuses on the other things that the man said, unable to form those words himself. At least not yet. He understands sex and the mindless things that go along with it, but feelings and love are just outside of his grasp.
He clears his throat and shifts back slightly, "Daozhang...you should finish cleaning up."
There is a tightness in his chest and it's hard to pretend to keep his cool with those words echoing in his ear.
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"Oh, I'm..." He thickly swallows, realizing that he gave his heart away so easily. But he...doesn't quite understand what just happened or what he's feeling. "Okay." That's not quite the reaction he's hoping for and he wonders if he did something wrong or is being too expressive or forward.
Feeling a sudden crash, trying to think. "No, I'm going to stay here for a while." The water is hot after all. "The hot water is nice."
Wanting to grasp whatever happiness he has, because today he survived and lived to this year, he still has some gratitude for him. "Um. Thank you. For coming to my birthday. I really mean that." He steps back and looks away.
Good thing water is good for washing away tears when it stings as he rubs his face, trying to wake up from his own stupidity.
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There is silence for a moment, Xue Yang still standing in the same spot as if glued there. Awkardly unsure what to do with himself. He needs to get cleaned up as well but he can't quite move ahead yet. "Daozhang...you're the first person to ever say that to me."
He will admit to that at least. But he knows that if they just let this go the air will be thick with awkwardness in their cabin. There isn't really an escape for them considering they sleep in the same place and they will end up there at the end of the day whether they want to or not.
Xue Yang doesn't want to disappoint Xingchen, but he also can't go against his nature and simply saying something so profound so quickly is impossible for him.
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Finally, he looks at him and he realized he misunderstood. It's that sad look, that paralyzed feeling emotions that also touches his heart. He listens to his confession, him admitting it, and maybe his intuition that he felt from before isn't wrong and he tries to understand.
"I'm your first? I think...we have plenty of first today." Silence followed and finally when he felt all clean and gathers the mental energy to scrub and felt anew.
No, there's no disappointment. Just a simple concern and care, "C'mon Xue Yang. If you stayed here too long, you'll get all pruney from all the steam."
He hands him a towel, "And let's slow down and take our time. I'm sorry. But what I felt for you, it's been there for a while now."
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He cares for Xingchen. He knows that much. If it is love, he can't be sure. Not yet anyway. Not until he can sort out what he is feeling and has time to process it. He won't say something that he isn't sure he feels with every fiber of his soul.
"How can it possibly be a long time? You didn't know it was me in Yi City and you haven't been here that long. How can you be sure what you are feeling?"
Perhaps what he really needs is someone to explain what it even is to have those kinds of feelings and how to know when they have formed.
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"It's not Yi City. It's much later than that. It's at the Winter Faire. That's when you changed, and I changed, and I can finally see and I'm seeing you, and that's when I wanted to see more of you." He still doesn't understand it himself and the intensity and complexity of his feelings, but he wishes those days never end.
"Like I said if it goes too fast for you, then I'll slow down."
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"I liked daozhang in Yi City." He's not afraid to admit that. Even if he can't quite understand love, he knows that much.
"It's already been a long time for me." He turns his face and opens his eyes to look at him. "Are you going to stop liking me if I can't say those words yet?"
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"I don't know yet." It's his honest answer and he doesn't quite understand either. "But we just made love, so I think that's special. That's why I think we may have something and I wanted to tell you how I felt about you since then. If you don't want me to stop, then we'll just keep going and continue what we have. Love is a very good thing and it means we're becoming a light to each other."
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He listens to him talk about being a light and wanting to continue. As long as Xue Yangs hesitancy towards the word love isn't enough to scare him off then he is glad to continue walking down this path with Xingchen.
"I'm going to save them and you'll hear them when you least expect them."
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He managed a soft laugh and a soft smile. "I'm surprised you like those things, Xue Yang. I wasn't a romantic at all. I'm just a simple daoist priest that doesn't make much money." He's going to shut off the water because he over rinsed and then takes a towel to dry himself and then get dressed in his hoodie and pants.
"I'm going to read a book and then go to sleep." He said, letting him know his evening is free.
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"I prayed to the train that you come back and when you did, you're in my cabin. I sleep better when you're around."
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"We sleep in the same cabin so you must sleep really well every night." He grins as he looks at him. Clearly the train knew what was going to happen before they did.
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"Surprisingly, I did. I haven't slept well in a long time. I hope the roommates don't bother you."
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The cabin is empty when they arrived. Xingchen searched for his book from his bed. "Would you like me to read to you as you sleep? It's a book of fairy tales."
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He reads out small tales from his book until Xue Yang drifts off and once he does, he smooths out his long black hair as he sleeps off before going to sleep himself on his bed opposite of him.